So I am in the midst of planning a new year's eve party at my house. It was kind of a last minute thing. I had said something to Jeramy about it , but we never talked about it futher. Then last Saturday night when I was hangin with my sister, we decided to go ahead and do it. So I already invited some people and as of right now there are about 6 or 7 going to come plus Jeramy and I. I have invited a lot more people, but some haven't responded yet. My sis and I are going to throw in on a keg..... that should be fun! It's better to have it at my house because then I don't have to worry about getting too drunk and driving home with all of the cops just sitting around waiting for people like me....lol...... Plus most of my friends live right around the corner, so they won't have to drive home too far. I am excited!
Friday, December 26, 2008
This Christmas was amazing to say the least. To see the eyes of my children light up, and the smiles on their faces are priceless! I do have to say that this was the best one the kids have had yet. It is all thanks to the man upstairs for helping Jeramy get his job and him making the kind of money that he is making now. It felt really good. You can see the smiles below: We had a million and one places to go this year, just like always. Jeramy said that next year is going to be different. His aunt Dee said that next year they are doing the get together on the saturday before Christmas. Which is wonderful cuz that means that we can do my family thing on Christmas Eve, and he said that on Christmas day that we are staying home. We are not going anywhere. I understand it because the kids don't really get any time to play with their toys or anything. By the time we leave one place, it is time to go somewhere else. I do have to say that I had the best Christmas ever also. Jeramy and the kids made me cry! Tears of joy of course.... I don't know ifyou can tell from this picture but it is a picture frame.
It has a "mom" charm on it, with a quote. The quote says , " A mom is she who can take the place of all others." And then he had a another charm put on it that says "Love Zane and Zoei." It was amazing! Brought tears to my eyes and made my cry. I also got some perfume "Beautiful" from estee lauder along with make-up from there. I got a bunch of stuff from my parents and my sister. I won't go through and name it all. But it was good to say the least. Jeramy got some shirts and Axe and Adidas clogne, some new shoes...... I forgot what else. The kids really made out from everyone. I am just really blessed. Point blank Blessed. I will leave you with some pic for your viewing pleasures:
Monday, December 22, 2008
Today is Monday: And I am going out shopping again....what is wrong with me lol!! I was going out last night to get Jeramy's last gift and I pulled in the parking lot and turned around and left. That place was a mad house! I didn't think about it being the last weekend before Christmas when I left the house. So the kids and I are going out today. Hopefully people have to work and it won't be so crazy! hhahahah yeah right!! Who am I kidding? Anyways I am going to get Jeramy a shirt. He needs clothes, well good clothes that he can wear out. He has a lot of things that he wears to work, but nothing really to go out in. I found a shirt yesterday and I loved it but I don't think he would like it.... so off we go to find one that he will like!
Friday, December 19, 2008
So today is suppose to be my last day of work. I am going to wait until Joram calls me and tells me he is on his way up there. That way I can meet up with him, give him the key to the office and get one of Jeramy's tools. Then after that I will be done with that office, and the crazyness that surrounds it. It's not so much the patients or the work itself. It's just having to deal with all of the disorgination. That place could run so much more better if it was in order. Maybe Joram will be the answer to all of that. I don't know. I asked Jeramy last night if he was worried at all about me not having a job anymore and he kind of chuckled and said "no." I said I need to hear that from you. Not that we count on that money, not that we need it to pay our bills, not that I am that mad about the whole situation, I just have my mothers desease where we worry. This life is so uncertain, and the only reason that I loved that job was because if Jeramy's work ever gets slow, then it was atleast money coming in ya know. Not much by any means, but it was something. Maybe it is my not feeling like I am doing anything as far as the bills go. I kind of feel like I have placed all of the burden of money on Jeramy. Not that he wants it any other way. He has said that once this job was gone that I was just going to stay at home, and espically when we have a baby. So it is the way he wants it. I guess I just need to laugh it off. I do think it is pretty funny how it all happened. Well I could say shitty how it all happened. For them not to say anything to me about it at all. For them just to let me go a week before Christmas is pretty low! Why couldn't she say to me that she wanted me to train Joram, and then she was going to let me go. That way I would of known up front. Jeramy and I already knew it was going to happen. As soon as Joram started coming up there, Jeramy said that I was going to lose my job to him. Jeramy was right! I am pretty much just rambeling. I have such mixed feelings about it. I think the thing that bothers me about it is how it all went down.
Thursday, December 18, 2008
So tomorrow December 19 will be my last day working for Dr. Carlin. I was officially given the boot today. She started off by saying that she was going to close the office next week to get caught up on all of her stuff. Then she went on to say that she thanked me for my efforts, that she was going to pay me and get that all taken care of, and that she needed her key back. She said now that Jeramy is working and making enough money that I need to go back to school during the daytime.lol funny to me that she used Jeramy's money as a way to soften the blow. It has been expected, just didn't know when it was going to happen. I knew that once Joram started coming in here and trying to learn everything that I was going to get the boot. Thank GOD above that I don't count on that money every week. Thank GOD above that Jeramy is making enough money to pay the bills. Speaking of Jeramy, he said well atleast now the house will be clean....lol....I said that is one way of looking at it ya know. He wants to get his tools back from Joram. Joram still has them all and he said that since Joram is going to be taking over my spot that he won't need the tools anymore, so he wants them back. We will see how this whole thing turns out. I hope that Jeramy doesn't hold any resentment towards Joram or his family because of all of this. I don't think he will, but you never know. Anyways I am going to go and print out all of my hours, get them all added up so that Dr. Carlin can write me my last check.......WOW!!!! Oh the ways of life ya know
Monday, December 15, 2008
So yesterday was a test of my patients, and I found out that I have none! lol... I went Christmas shopping which was fine. The lines weren't too long, so that was good. When I got home, I decided that I was going to put lights up on the front porch. Well I hate lights to begin with .They always get so tangled up. Then the kids decided that they were going to help me. UMMMM yeah. It was fine for a little while but they were so hyper that it started getting on my nerves. Then my mom and I went and got a tree. When we got home we put it up. THe kids had fun decorating it, and the cats had fun tearing it up. OMG! I thought that I was going to kill two cats. They are currently locked up in Zoei's room due to the fact that they won't leave it along. I know that they are just kittens but damn it! I had glass ornimates(spelling)? I am going to buy a water bottle today and just spray the shit out of them when they get near it. It is the only thing that I know to do. I can't beat the crap out of them ya know! want to yes, but I am trying to be good lol. Anyways today we are going to buy Zane's santa present. A playstation 3! I told Jeramy what are we going to do when he is 14 and wants us to spend 2000 dollars on him...... lol it won't happen but it is funny to me that we are going to spend 600 dollars on his santa. I am just thankful that we have the money to do it ya know. Zoei wants a hula hoop from santa...hahahahhah too cute! She also wants a jewlery box so that is what we are going to get her. Then we will pick them up a couple of more things to open that go under the tree. I bought Zoei a make-up kit yesterday and Zane three DS games. I knocked out pretty much all of Jeramy's family yesterday except the chinese thing we are doing at Vince's house. I already got my mom and sister, so we really only have my dad and whatever Jeramy and I are going to buy for eachother and then we are done. I am excited about Christmas, it is my favorite time of the year. It seems like this year has flown by so fast. I never understood that until I had kids ya know.Anyways Jeramy just pulled up in the driveway so we are going to go.
Friday, December 12, 2008
I don't know how all of these good things just keep falling into my lap. First and formost, I have the world's best kids, the world's best man, and life can't get any better. Jeramy is finally making enough money to support us and we just use my paycheck to run on. Okay so you all know back in 07 when I left Ken, I got unemployment benefits. Well I went through all of that money. Then they sent me a letter saying that they approved me for 13 more weeks of emergency unemployment benefits. We went through all of that money. Well, about a week ago I got another letter in the mail and it said that the president had signed off on another emergency plan. It said to fill out all of the paperwork they sent me and send it in. Well I did it thinking that I wasn't going to get it . The last person that I spoke to said that since I was working for Dr. Carlin and she wasn't taking out taxes that I wasn't going to get any more. Anyways like I said I filled out the paperwork and sent it in. I get home from work today and found a letter from them. I opened it up and they said that I was approved for another 7 weeks of unemployment!!!! Can you believe this? I really can't. I filed my claim today telling them how much money I made from Dr. Carlin for the past two weeks, and it said my claim went through. That I need to make my next claim on December 21. I have 1078.00 dollars that they are going to give me. Of course it is spread out throughout the next weeks, and each week's amount depends on how much I made from Dr. Carlin. But this is amazing. Just out of the blue things keep dropping in my lap. I am so blessed and it is all because of the man upstairs. It is crazy to me that my life use to be this ball of weirdness, and now everything is falling into place. I am so excited about my life now and what is going to come in my future. GOD is good and so am I!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thursday, December 11, 2008
So I am sitting at work, it's 12:20 in the afternoon and I am so bored. Joram came up here this morning and was working on scheduling more patients. I just sat back and let him do his thing. I was printing off schedule sheets and calander pages. It is weird with him being here but it's cool I guess. Not much that i can do about it ya know. It's like I am waiting for Dr. Carlin to tell me that I am not going to work out and Joram is taking over my spot. It's all good though.
I just talked to Jeramy and we were talking about presants for everyone. There is so much shopping that I have to do. He just told me that he is going to work on Sunday also, so that blows us going shopping this weekend. He said you are just going to have to go shopping for everyone, I work too much. Which is fine, I just like having him there. He wants to be there for the kids stuff no matter what. He said that maybe on Sunday afternoon we can get my mom to watch the kids and we can go shopping for them. Every year since we have been together he has wanted to go with me when I shop for the kids. It is really cool to see. He loves picking out things for Zane. Girl things are out of his comfort level, but that is why I am there. I really love this time year. Okay this is just a ramble....I am going to go
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
So I got really confused today at work. Dr. Carlin broke her arm a couple of weeks ago. So she told her son Joram, who use to work with Jeramy that he could be her little assistant for awhile. Being that she couldn't write, he had to do it for her. So Monday he is in the office with me. Asking me questions about how you do this or how that works. Didn't really think anything of it. He said that he was up there because his mom didn't need him at the medical school so she told him to come up to the office. So Today I was up at work. They all show up there. Dr. Carlin , her husband and Joram..... I am thinking okay this is kind of weird. At first it was me setting the appointments and everything and then Dr. Carlin got involved. So by the end of the day, Dr. Carlin and Joram were behind the desk, he was the one setting the appointments, she was telling him how to send certain things to SSI, and how to do this or that..... I was sitting in the waiting area doing nothing. Joram hasn't been working since Jeramy got this new job. They were working together but Jeramy couldn't make enough money so he switched jobs, but Joram didn't. He teaches Kung Fu in Dallas 3 nights a week, so he has to leave arlington by 4 everyday. He admited to me , which I already knew, But he said that he can't go get a real construction job because they all want you to stay there until the job is done. You can't leave at 4 to go do something else. His mom owns her own Dr.'s office... so I think I am going to be replace by her son... It just seems so funny to me that all of a sudden he is showing up at the office, and now she is teaching him to do things around the office. It really doesn't matter because I can find something else to do, watch kids or something. Quite frankly I really don't have to work because Jeramy makes enough money. So it's not that I am worried about losing my job because of the money, it is just weird to me that it is happening this way. Lisa, the old girl, didn't get any warning about me taking over her job, so I wonder if that is going to happen with me. We will see how this whole thing turns out.........
Today when I woke up, it finally felt like Christmas. Well I guess it started yesterday, but this cold weather really makes me feel "in the season." I asked Jeramy about getting a tree on Sunday. I said that is only two weeks before Christmas, he didn't like that idea. They make him sneeze so he doesn't want to suffer two whole weeks. So I said well then lets get a fake tree. He didn't like that idea either. He wants a real one cuz it is Christmas, and we have kids. So looks like a lose lose situation for me. I am ready to get it up and start wrapping presents.I want to put lights on the outside of the house. But Jeramy is never going to be home in time to do them. So I think I will just put them on the porch. Wrap them around the poles and stuff.... YEA.... I am really excited. I bought my sister and my moms presents yesterday. I can't tell you what I got my sister cuz she might read this, but for my mom I got her :had to edit this...forgot my mom reads this.... it's really pretty. If I was on my computer I could show you a picture of it, but I am at work so I can't. My sister's is really pretty too. Zoei doesn't think that Ashley will like it but I do.... so there!!! hahahah Anyways guess I better get some work done around here.
Monday, December 8, 2008
Happy is how you can describe my life right now. I am so in love with Zoei and Zane. Those little boogers are such a joy in my life. I find myself watching them playing in amazement. They come home these little people who do nothing but pee and poop. And they grow into these people with imaginations, thoughts , feelings, and emotions. I love listening to them come up with all of these different games, and ways to play the same ol' games. We had a little "thing" happen this weekend, so I just told Kyle to bring the kids home to me. When they got home we ate lunch and played. The tickle monster came out and we ran all over the house. I really love them and I am so glad that GOD choose me to be their mother. I love my other big booger too. Jeramy was home more these past few days. Thursday he left early to try to get into a dentist. He didn't get in until Friday. So we took the kids to school and then took him to the dentist. He ended up having a root canal done. Well the first part of it. He didn't go back into work that day. Then Saturday he did have to work but got off and a normal time....6. The kids went to my moms house to spend the night so Jeramy and I just chilled. Ate dinner, and I watch t.v. while he played poker. Then Sunday we did a whole lot of nothing. He played poker and watch football. I did all the laundry in the house, and that was about it. Watched the cowboys get beat.....tear ;( Anyways today is Monday and back to the grind. Have to start getting ready for Christmas. I am so excited....... only 17 more days to go!!!
Friday, December 5, 2008
You are not going to believe the voicemail that I just got. I still can't believe the voicemail that I just got...It was from Rachel....Kyle's ex-girlfriend. Well the are ex's as of yesterday, but what the crap. She said that she just wanted to admit to me, even though she hates to admit it, but that I was right about Kyle the whole time........ What do I think about that? I really don't know what to think about it honestly. Do I get pride out of knowing that she called me and told me that? Do I think what the crap, why is she calling me? Do I think what is her motive behind all of this? I have no idea what to think..... I am still in shock. Me and this chick have all but gone round and round physically. We have cussed at each other, we have tried to defend our sides, she has said shit to me that Kyle did but put it off on me, I really am confused about it all. Kyle told me yesterday that I don't have to worry about her anymore because she is out. He said the only reason she would call me is to try to be buddy buddy with me.... I really can't believe that this is all happening.....
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
So when I talked to Jeramy while I was in jail, he said that my mom and sister were up at the jail paying the fines. I called my sister and she said that they were already up there. I am thinking the they are going to be sitting out there waiting for me to come out. Thinking they would be there to give me a ride home. Well the people told them that it could take any where from 2 to 8 hours to get me out. They stayed up at the jail until 8:30, and of course I get out at 9. They handed me the bag with all of my stuff in it. My necklace, both of the rings that Jeramy got for me and my license. I start walking the block where I was let out at thinking that I would see them parked some where. Well I didn't see them. Then I think well I will just walk to a pay phone. So I go up about 5 blocks then take a right. If anyone knows downtown ft worth, I walked all the way up to the court house and then about 2 blocks over. I reached back into my pocket and realized that along the way I had dropped my bag of stuff. So here I am thinking there is no way that I am going to find it. First of all I am in downtown ft worth, if someone see's it they are going to pick it up. Second the wind was blowing like crazy so I figured if no one had picked it up , it was for sure blowing in the wind somewhere. So I start my track back. I re-trace every step that I took and finally on the last block, on the last side of that block I see it. It is up against the building. The wind was blowing but it was blowing in that direction so it was just holding it up there. I was so thankful!!!! Not because they items are really expensive, but they have so much meaning to me. One of the rings was the one that Jeramy gave me on our first Valentines day together. The other one was the ring he gave me last christmas and proposed to me with. The necklace I have had for ever I don't remember when he gave that to me, but it had my new locket on it he had just bought me. So needless to say I was freaking out about finding it. I was so happy that I did. I was just thanking GOD above. No other time in our lives has Jeramy ever gotten paid on a Tuesday, never in our lives has Jeramy had the kind of paychecks that he is getting right now. I was just giving praise to GOD that we had the money to pay the fines..... Yes it was a crazy day but it all worked out in the end. Thanks to the man upstairs. So that was the end to my crazy Tuesday..... Now that all of my stuff is taken care of , I won't have to worry about going back to jail.......
A jail bird..... Tarrrant County Jail in downtown Ft. Worth was my home yesterday for about 6 hours. Jeramy called me yesterday about 2 and said that he needed me to bring him some food to eat. He was starving, and wasn't going to get off work until 8 or 9. So I called my mom to see if she would pick up Zane at 3:20. Zoei had her destination imagination yesterday so she didn't get out until 4. I knew I could make it back in time to pick her up. So I go and get a pizza and hot wings for Jeramy. I take it to him. He was off of 35 and 1187rd. I get there drop it off to him at 3:30. I get back on the road, I am going down 35 and I see the cop get on the highway. So I slow down knowing that I have warrants. There were two cars in front of me. The cop starts slowing down like crazy so I have no choice but to keep up with the flow of traffic and keep going. He gets behind me, the exit for 20 was coming up so I got over in the left lane, and he followed me over there. Then he puts his lights on. So I called Jeramy right then and told him that I was getting pulled over and that I was probably going to jail. Then Zane calls me on the phone and starts telling me about all of this and that and I am like put nana on the phone. So my mom gets on the phone and I tell her the same thing that I am probably going to jail. The cop comes up to the window and says that the reason that he pulled me over is because there is no front license plate on my car. So I tell him that it is a firebird and there is no way to put one on the front of the car.He goes back and runs my name. He comes back up to me and tells me to get out of the car. So he says that I have 2 warrants out of Haltom City, which I knew I had. He asks me a couple of questions, and says well I am going to cut you a break today and let you go. So I am like thank you, thank you.... He gets back in his car, I get in my car and as I am putting my car in first gear, he taps on my window again. He tells me to get back out of the car. He says your license is suspended. I played dumb and told him that I didn't know about it. So he says is there someone who can pick up your daughter. I told him that I could call my mom. I got to call Jeramy too and tell him to come and sit with the car until my mom got there to drive it off. So he handcuffs me and I get in the back of the cop car. Stephanie txt's me, so I txt her back and tell her that I am going to jail. She called me, so I answered it. She is like what? I told her that I was sitting in the back of the cop car and was going to jail. We talked for a few and then hung up. So Jeramy gets there and off we go to jail. It isn't like Arlington Jail.... they have electric doors, and shit. So anyways I go in and have to take off all my jewelry and sign for all of it. Then they take me to the booking station. They take my mug shot, and finger print me. All the while all of these dudes are yelling from behind the glass in tarrant county jump suits, hey baby...blah blah blah...... Craziness!!! So anyways after we do all of that shit he puts me in a cell. I call Jeramy and shit and tell him that I have been booked in and that he would be able to call and find out how much I owed. After sitting in the holding cell for more than an hour, they call me out. I have to go fill out all of this paperwork and shit. Then they send me to the medic to that I can get a T.B. shot. Then I go back in a holding cell. About 30 minutes later, they come and get me again. They hand me a cup, toothbrush, toothpaste, razor and a comb, and tell me to dress out. I am telling them that my mom is paying the fines right now and that I would be out in no time, so it isn't worth me "dressin out". She wasn't hearing it.... she was such a bitch. Anyways I go into this room and get strip searched. Put on my Tarrant County Jail suit and the shoe's they give you. She hands me this bag with a mattress cover, and a blanket in it and tells me to go to elevator d. She said when it opens get in it and hold up a one and a three to the video camera. So I got on the elevator and held up my number 13. The door opens, and I go to Block "D" . I wait for the lady to open the door. She searches me again. Then tells me that I am going to be in cell number 41. I had to leave my stuff there and go get a mattress. I had to carry the mattress up two flights of stairs to cell 41. Then come back down and get my stuff and go make my bed. I made my bed and just sat there. I guarantee you it wasn't 15 minutes and she was calling me on my speaker inside my cell. She said , " Bowling, get your stuff together you are leaving." I am thinking you mother fuckers, I told you that I was going to be leaving soon and you made me do all of this shit. So I had to get my mattress and carry it back down 2 flights of stairs and put it back up. GO back up there and get all of my blankets and paperwork. I carry it back down there and she goes through it all. She searches me again, and then I get to get back on the elevator. I go to level three and change back into my regular clothes. They put me back in a holding cell for a while. Then this dude comes and gets me. They finger print me again and then walk me out of this door. bam I am back out in the real world. After a whirlwind of an experience. There is another situation that happened when I left the jail with my bag of things they gave me. But I will go into that in a little while. I got home last night and sat in the bath tub...lord only knows what kind of shit was in that place so I had to wash myself. I laid in the tub thinking did that all just really happen to me.....It was like an out of body experience. Yes I have been to jail before and yes I have had to "dress out" before. But this was nothing like Arlington Jail...... def a day that I won't forget.....
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
What the crap..... I have been having some crazy ass dreams. I had a dream about Ashley and Bryan, I had another dream about one of my other friends...can't remember who, but the one that I had last night tops them all off. I had a dream that Jeramy gave me a kiss in the morning like he always does, then went to work and DIED!!!! It was so detailed, and it felt so real. I think that I actually cried in my sleep last night because when I woke up this morning, my eyes hurt so bad, and were swollen. You know that hurt and puffiness that your eyes get when you have been crying.... I am seriously freaked out. He got up at 6:00, and said good morning baby, and I just grabbed him. He said, well good morning..I said I had the scariest dream last night. He said what was it, I told him that I had a dream about him dying. I said You went to work and then never came back. He said that's not going to happen baby....... (quite frankly you never know.) But anyways he got ready for work and then got back in bed with me. I just held him. I told him that if he could get out of work today that I would keep him home with me all day long. We just laid there and snuggle wuggled (our made up love bird words). I sent him a text message a little while ago and told him that I was still freaked out. It's like I can't get it out of my head..... I don't know where all of these dreams are coming from.... I use to not remember my dreams at all. But now they are so vivid that they are scary.
Monday, December 1, 2008
So my dad is suppose to have knee surgery on Thursday. He goes into the hospital to day to get some blood work done and they take his blood pressure. It is at 188/one hundred something!!! That is walking stroke level people. I am suprised that he hasn't had a stroke yet.... So they put his knee surgery off until he see's his heart doctor. That is the least of my worries right now. He went to a heart dr forever ago and they put him on meds for high blood pressure. He took them for a while and then decided to take himself off of the meds. Why, I don't know.....I am worried ya'll. He smokes 2 packs and starts on his 3rd pack of smokes everyday. Everytime he lights up he is raising his blood pressure even more. No one is going to tell him to stop, nor does he want to quit. Not that I have room to talk because I smoke too. But this scares me. My mom has high blood pressure too and she too took herself off of her meds. She is doing something that she read in a book, home remidies or something. But she has never been to a dr to know if they are working or not. She said that she doesn't ever want to go into a dr's office again. If she is going to go then she just wants to go. Obviously that is how my dad feels too by taking himself off of the meds he was on.... This really makes no sense to me at all. For either one of them. That is how Linda died. Jeramy's little brother Kevin, his mom. THey told her that she needs to be on meds for her high blood pressure, but she never took them. She died on the soccer field at 57....... Worried is an understatement for me right now. Not that I am going to be able to talk them into anything.... so there is no reason for me to freat about it.... but still..... I don't know what to do or to think.....
- Welcome to the wonderful life of me! I am married to my best friend, my soul mate, my right hand man, the love of my life and we have been blessed with 3 beautiful Z kiddos. Jeramy and I have known each other since we were 14 &16, and have been married for 5 years. He is in the Army and I get to be a stay at home mommy :) We have had our ups and downs, life hasn't always been peaches and cream, but we are blessed!