Monday, April 27, 2009

Pictures for you Rena


This is a picture of him nailed to the cross. He has needles though is chest and by his eyes, that is why there is blood. This is the picture he decided to show my children.


This is him doing tattoos



This is his stripper girlfriend who is now pregnant with his baby. This is what she calls modeling




This is another shot of what she calls modeling





Kyle with his stripper girl, and some dude






Here is another shot of him being tied to the cross




So thankful....April 27,2009


I am so thankful this morning! I am thankful everyday but today I woke up to a wonderful thing. Let me tell you a little bit about it so that you can appreciate the situation. Jeramy as you all know has been getting unemployment until he goes into "active duty." We were kind of sweatin it because his benefits run out the end of June. Well he doesn't leave until July 20th. So we were stressin about how we are going to pay the bills for that month. I have gone on a few interviews but nothing has come out of any of it. I know that it isn't where I am suppose to be according to GOD, so I really haven't been to worked up about it. Well last week I got a letter from the unemployment office saying that I could qualify for more benefits. So I filled out the paper work and faxed it back.Yesterday I was doing Jeramy's payment request online. After I did his I thought I am going to log into my account just to see what happens. The last time I tried to make a payment request it said that it had been over three weeks since my last request so I had to call this number. Anyways, I loged onto my account and it let me make a payment request. So last night I could hardly sleep due to me wondering if it was really going to play out like this. I woke up this morning and called to check to see if they sent Jeramy's payment, and they did. I hung up and called back and put in my social security number and it said they had sent a payment for me too!!!!!!!!! So this means for that month we were stressin about.... will be taken care of. THANKS to the Man Upstairs!!! Blessed beyond anything that I deserve! I don't know how people can walk through life not believing in GOD...how can you explain all of the good things in this life? I am just so thankful! HE always comes through and takes care of us! THANK YOU GOD!!!!!!!!!!

Friday, April 24, 2009

Letting off some steam


Yes I have blog about this because it is buggin the hell out of me. As you all know Kyle hasn't seen my kids since the middle of March. He got kicked out of his house, which I know suprises you all I know, and didn't have any where to go. He didn't call or anything until April 9th. We were out to dinner for my dads birthday and he called. Said he was going to call back and talk to the kids. Well he never did. So about a week or so ago I started getting these text messages saying "daddy loves zane and zoei very much" I let the first couple of ones go, even though I wanted to go off on his ass. About the 5th one I wrote him back and all I said was "just stop". Meaning stop sending the text messages, actions speak louder than words, so you sending the text messages is bull shit. Didn't say all of that but that is what I ment. He wrote me back and said that the kids need to know that he loves them and I can't make him stop. So I wrote him back and said the kids have a dad named Jeramy, Kyle doesn't exist anymore. And all I have to do is change my number and I don't have to deal with him anymore. Didn't hear from him for a couple of days and then last night he started again. He sent his famous text message so I sent one saying F U...that is all I put. I figured he was atleast smart enough to get that. So he sent one saying "No fuck you april, I will everyday write my kids and I will see them again so matter what you say." Well that left the door open to say everything that I wanted to say so I wrote back to him saying,"Whatever you say Kyle, Talked to a lawyer and know what my rights are, there is nothing you can do and there is nothing in the divorce papers saying that i have to let you talk to them." I went on to say "Take me to court if you want things different and while we are there you can answer to why you are in contempt of court, I said we have a court date this month we can settle it all then." So he wrote back saying just because I don't like him I make the kids suffer, real grown up. Have fun acting like your dads ex wife, see you there." He said too that I can answer why I am in contempt of court. I told him technically I'm not in contempt, he is...I already found out what is allowed and not, there is nothing I am doing that is wrong. So anyways he didn't write me back but I felt the need to say one more thing, of course, I have to get the last word in. So I wrote " I enjoy keeping my kids out of your crazyness, they will be better people because of it, I said I feel sorry for your new baby, with parents like you and rachel that baby doesn't stand a chance, neither one of you take care of the kids that you have now." No response from him.... so I am going to change my number : eventually. He is moving to Kentucky, he put his page on private so that I can't see what he puts on there, but he doesn't know that I already copied the page he had. I have a copy of him saying that he is moving to Kentucky. He has since changed it to visiting Kentucky, but I already know what his intentions are. I really am done with him, and now that I know for sure that I am not doing anything wrong, he can get as mad as he wants to but it isn't going to change. Period. Love you all Have a happy friday!

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Singin Praise as Steph would say




I love this man more than anything! I know you already know all of that lol, but these pictures speak volumes. He makes it a priority to hang with the kids. Him and Zane play that PS3, and he goes as far as watching Suite life of Zack and Cody with Zoei. REAL FATHER! All I am going to say!
Anyways got some good news, some I know for sure, and the other could turn out to be really good. First the news that I already know for sure: Let me tell you the story: I have gotten food stamps since Zane was born. Every three or six months they review your case. Well in March I was working for Equal Health. I had a phone interview that I couldn't do because I was working. So I called them and told them I missed my appointment, so they rescheduled it for April 2nd. I did my phone interview and then the next day Jeramy and I went and turned in all of the paperwork, since I had gotten married I had to add Jeramy to the case. Well they had until April 13th to make a decision. That day came and went. So I called my case worker and she told me that she had a death in the family so she didn't get a chance to work my case. So I said I was so sorry to hear that, and when she got to it would be fine. So she said that she would work it that night for me to check my card the next day. I did that and there was nothing on the card. Next day she calls and leaves me a voicemail saying that we made too much money for the month of April, so I was going to have to reapply. So I called her and explained where all the extra money came from. I had to leave her a voicemail. So night before last I couldn't sleep. No real reason, I was just up at 2 in the morning.I decided to call the automated system just to see by chance if anything was on there. It said my case was active, instead of saying denied like it had been doing. So I listen more, they approved us for 96 dollars for the month of April. Then starting in May we are going to get 668.00 dollars a month!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Holy cranoles!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That is way more than enough to feed my family for a month ya know. That is why I said yesterday Thank you GOD. Didn't need as much as he provided, but thank you! It is such a blessing. I almost feel out of my chair when I heard it, then I sure as hell couldn't go back to sleep because I was so excited! God is amazing and I am truly blessed!

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Proud


Can I just brag a little bit? Of course I can cuz it's my blog....lol I love that I am finally married to a man that my dad approves of. I think women can deny the fact that they want their dad's approval, but deep down inside you still long for it. The whole time I was with Kyle I tried to make him be the person I wanted him to be and that others would approve of. Took me seven years to realize that you can't make someone else want what you want. What is important to you is not important to other people, no matter how much you want it. Jeramy and I got back together over four years ago. When my dad walked me down the isle a month ago, it was the first time since I was a kid that I felt like he was proud of me. I finally felt like I was doing the right thing the right way. My dad was giving me away to a man who in many ways is just like him. I held my head up high, and was walking on air. Yes my dad and I have gotten a lot closer over this past year or so, but that was the defining moment.
Yesterday Jeramy and I went and got our military id cards. Feel a little special about that.... But anyways my mom had to pick up the kids from school because we weren't going to make it. So we finally got to the parents house about 3:35. Jeramy and I waited outside for a while just talking about what we just did, and how we felt about it. My dad was already home, he stayed inside for a little bit, but then he came out there and started talking to us. Him and Jeramy went back and forth about the army stuff, and this and that. I just sat there in amazment that my dad was talking to my husband. My father, just like Jeramy, is a man of little words. They don't talk unless they have something to say. But he came out there and started up a converstation. I'm just proud I guess you can say. I am proud that my dad is proud of me, I am proud of my children because they are the best kids anyone could ask for, I am proud of my husband for taking on this new life, this new journey at almost 30 years old. I am just proud of my life. For once in my life...... WOW! Thank you GOD!

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Jeramy Dying...what the crap?

To see someone dying in your dream, signifies that your feelings for that person are dead or that a significant change/loss is occurring in your relationship with that person. Alternatively, you may want to repress that aspect of yourself that is represented by the dying person:


So last night I had another dream that Jeramy died. This is the second time it happened. Both times I have woken up crying, literally crying, then I see him in the bed next to me, and I calm down. So I googled dying and the response above is what I got. My feelings for him have not changed, I still love him more than anything in this world. Significant change...hummm, he is going to be leaving me for almost 9 months. Could that have something to do with it? I don't know...the first dream I had about him was in December. The reason I remember that so much is because I was so worried about him all day long.I kept asking him while he was working are you alright, are you okay...then I took him pizza and ended up going to jail that same day. BOOOOOOOO! But anyways, we had not decided that he was going to go into the army national guard yet. We weren't even talking about it. He was still working good for Matt, so that topic hadn't even come up yet. I don't know what it means: it's sad though. I wake up feeling so helpless, and so SAD..... sad is an understantment.... don't know what to think about it.
Anyways we are going to go get our military id's today... YAY!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, April 13, 2009

APRIL11,2009







































So my sister is officially married. I can't believe it! It was such a beautiful day. I am so glad the rain held off. Ashley had this since of calm about her. I really thought she was going to be a blubbering mess, but she didn't cry at all! I am so happy for her! I will write another blog later. I have to go start packing up crap and moving it.....CONGRATS TYLER AND ASHLEY BRANECKY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!






Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Wednesday April 8th 2009


This man and I are moving! Along with the kiddos. After being in this house for over two years, I really don't know where to start! What room do we start moving first? And how much do we move being that we are having one last Easter bash at our house on Sunday? I think we are going to leave the kids room, bed and dresser, but are going to start moving their toys. In the living room we are going to leave our couches and the TV but are going to move the end tables and coffee table. I have taken a lot of the pictures and things off the walls, so it looks a little bare. I hate having bare walls! Then we have to figure out what we are going to take to storage. We know for sure the washing machine and dryer and the big screen TV. And Zane's bed and things from his room. The kids have had their own rooms for over two years, but have probably slept in different beds maybe 5 times.....lol i guess it's not a big deal to me if it isn't for them. I am sure that we are getting close to that being that Zane will be 8 in about a month. This apartment will only be temporary. Jeramy leaves in three months to start his training. When he comes back in Feb. he will have to look for a job. There is a place that hires Apache helicopter mechanics straight out of the army. It's in Killeen Tx...so there is a chance that we will have to move to Temple. But then there is also a chance he can get a job a bell helicopter so we might just find a house around here....we will see what GOD has in store for us. We are all up for the ride ahead of us. It is going to be crazy with Jeramy not being here. We were talking about it last night. I said we are going to move into a new place, then he is going to be gone. He said well by the time I leave it won't be too new. We will be use to it. He said think about me. I said you are so right. By the time he gets use to the apartment, he is moving to Kentucky....by the time he starts getting use to Kentucky, he will be moving to Virginia...then once he gets use to there , he will be moving back here.... so he is up for a lot more than the kids and I are. Anyways gotta go start moving some more crap...lol....

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

What a day yesterday: Well last night

Um so I guess I need to back up a little bit before you will understand the whole story. My mom goes out with her sisters maybe sometime last week...not sure of the day. Well my mom is showing them pictures of my wedding. My aunt Diane feels the need to pop off and say that both my sister and Tyler are fat. Now this lady weights 200lbs. so for her to say someone else is fat us just unheard of. So when I find this out I get pretty pissed off. How dare you say something about my sister and her husband. My aunt has a facebook. So I wrote on my status: Wondering why an almost 60 year old feels the need to talk shit about 23 year olds....hmmmm... must be insecurities on her part...GROW THE F UP.... Your negative comments are not needed just make you look stupid: So I get a call from my mother last night around 9 or 10. My aunt called and told my mommy on me. So I told my mom that I am a 26 year old woman, and if I want to say something to her then I will. My mom wasn't pissed off or anything...she thought it was pretty funny. My aunt played it off like she didn't know if it was about her or not. So my mom asked me what to tell her. I told my mom to tell her that it was about her and it is all in regards to my sister. So she does just that. My aunt asked my mom, did I offend you when I said it, and my mom said yes. I don't like to hear people tell me my kids are fat. So instead of saying i'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend you. She says well I just would of never recognized tyler, he just doesn't look the same. IDIOT! Yes he does. My cousin saw him yesterday who hadn't seen him since she was 14 or so and asked him straight out are you Tyler..... so how can a 14 year old remember him but a 60 year old can't? hmmmmmm So anyways she writes on facebook last night back to me: This is what she said: and then my response back to her:

Diane Hanna Looney- There are some people that don't need to be on FB,they talk about how GOD has been good to them and then turn around and use dirty,nasty,disrespectful words on here. See a little problem here, guess you have to consider the source.

April Wilcox at 11:44pm April 6
Hmmm dirty nasty disrespectful words....aren't those what you said about my sister? Callin the kettle black now aren't we. I see that you commented on my status twice but were too chicken shit to leve it on there.. well i'm not: You need to reconsider the source and take a look in the mirror.Miss go to church but have sex when you are not married... , miss go to church but still feel the need to talk shit about my sister and her husband... now that isn't very godly like is it? Aren't you not suppose to judge... hmmm you have to call my mommy.... HOW CHILDISH ARE YOU? Aren't you 60? If you have something to say about what I have said then be a woman about it and ask me... You are miserable in your own life so you have to talk shit about other people to make yourself feel better. Everyone see's it, You have no problem dishing crap out but when other people say something back to you, you run and call their mommies.....LMFAO at YOU. You are childish and I have no respect for you!
April Wilcox at 11:51pm April 6
Questioning my relationship with GOD.... WOW! You are one to talk. GOD has been so good to me....you have no idea. I don't have to justify my relationship with him to you. You can go f yourself when it comes to that... once again you have no idea. Just because I stick up for my sister all of a sudden you want to question it...... WHATEVER...GET OVER YOUSELF! You say my sister is fat...well you out weigh her by 100 lbs... so if she is fat then what are you...OBESE? I would think so. Take a good hard look in the mirror before you go around calling other people fat.

Last night was pretty amusing to me! Me and this woman have never been able to get along. She is just rude, and loves to talk about other people. She always made my other aunt, the one that has since died, made her feel worthless. She always wanted to come in a rearrange her furniture, she always had something to say about how she dressed. She always had something to say about my ex-husband. Yes I know I am sticking up for Kyle, but she would say shit in front of everyone. She has no respect for any other human beings feelings. Whatever she needs to say at that moment in time to make herself feel better, then she will do it at the cost of everyone else. No respect for anyone, which in turn makes me have no respect for her.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Saturday April 11,2009


On Saturday April 11,2009 at 6:00pm my sister will officially be a married woman! I really can't believe that she is starting this new chapter in her life. It seems like yesterday we were both little girls playing outside. Or in the backyard with our dad pushing us around in the wheel barrow. For her to be 23 and getting married is mind blowing. She has always had a good head on her shoulders and has known what she wants out of life. She has never let anything or anyone hold her back from doing what she wants to do. To say that I am proud of her is an understatement! She has turned into this amazing woman who truly inspires people. Her positive outlook on life is addicting, and he will to want more will always keep her at the top of her game. So Ashley Leann this is for you. I am so proud to be your big sister. You are amazing to say the least, and I am so glad we have the kind of relationship that we have. You are going to be an awesome wife, and an amazing mother. I love you dearly... more than words will ever be able to describe! Here's to you and your new chapter in your life... IT IS GOING TO BE THE BEST TIME THUS FAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, April 5, 2009

PRAISE GOD!!!!!!!!!!


GOD OS OH SO GOOD!!!! I am still constantly reminded of how he will provide and how he comes through!!! Okay, so you all know how we are moving. After being here for over two years, the time has come. We paid the app fee and the move in price. But we were kind of stressin about coming up with some more money....depending on the apts, we might have to come up with another 300 dollars. Cell phone bill is due and we have to pay that so we know if I got the job at AAA. Kind of stressin to say the least. Well I go over to my moms house last night and when I was pulling out of my driveway I though damn I need to check the mail. Get out of my car and check the mail. THERE IS A CHECK FOR 900 DOLLARS IN THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! As you all know we get money for Zane having ADHD...SSI disability. Well we got the usual check on the first, which allowed us to pay the car payment, and rent a center, pay the app fee and the move in price. So to say the least I was speachless when I saw that other check in there. It is the last one of his installment payments. There could of not been better timing! Once again GOD came through. I don't understand how people can not believe in HIM.... how else can you explain all of the wonderful things that happen in life? I prayed all the way to my moms house last night just thanking him and saying GOD you have always come through in my life, and I am so blessed. THANK YOU JESUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am on cloud 9000 right now. This whole move thing is going to happen, we have the money to do it, we have money to get a u-haul truck..... we also have money to get my iud taken out..that is a whole different story, will explain in another blog!

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Moving:


So Friday the landlord told us that we have to move. Yes we could fight it but is it really worth it? At the begining of March he wrote us a letter saying that we needed to pay the rent. We responded by saying if you fix everything that is broken in the house then we will, but until then by law we don't have to..... So about three weeks ago he finally fixed everything that was broken in the house and said that Jeramy could fix the fence for the rent. That once Jeramy went into acitve duty, then we would talk about it. We offered to pay the rent for April, but he said no don't worry about it. Well he has went back on is word , and now wants us out. So Friday when we found out we went and looked at apartments. We did all the paper work and will find out monday if we get it or not. I read the reviews and they are not so good but right now we can't really be beggers. It is either move there for a little while or go live with somone, and I would rather live in the not so good place rather than live with someone ya know. It will only be for a little while because when Jeramy gets back there is a chance we could move to temple. It will due for the time being. I read the reviews on other apartments that I know look better than the ones we will move into and they are all bad. So I have come to realize that the only people who write reviews are the pissed off ones. Anyways say a little prayer that we get into the apartment. We need it. We have to be out of this place by the 3rd of May.......

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Oh Happy Day


So today was my interview at AAA. It was the longest interview that I have been on in my 26 years on this planet. 3 freakin hours! I had to be there at 10 this morning. Had to fill out a paper application. Then had to take a 40 min computer test, then had to listen to some live calls, then we finally got to my interview. Had to sit down with two ladies and they gave me different question I had to give them personal answers to. I finally got out of there at 1:15. I won't know until next Friday if I get the job or not. And even then training won't start until May. But whateva...... Well it is now almost 8 at night. I have to go help Zane finish up his homework. Then off to bed..I am one tired broad.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Happy April Fool's day


April 1,2009....WOW! This year is just flying by. I never thought that way until I had children, but I see it now. My baby girl just turned 6, and my son will be 8 in May. Crazy to think that I have a 6 and 8 year old. Plus maybe adding one more to the bunch. That will be crazy to have two kids in school and then to start at the infant stage again... We will see where our lives take us. You never know. Anyways, today I have a job interview at 3:30 with a cable company. Don't know what the pay or the hours are going to be, but none the less I am excited about it. Dispatching is what I know. I enjoy the hectic pace, and the calls coming and going. Makes the days go by really fast. We will see how it goes. I am really stoked about my job interview with AAA on Thursday. AAA dispatching is what I know inside and out. I pretty much ran Ken's business on many occasions. When he went to California, I did everything for about a week. Some days I would go into work at 9, dispatch there until 5, leave at 5 but transfer the phones to myself and work until we went off duty at 11pm. All the AAA "slang" I know, the T-codes everything.... I am sure it will be a little different actually being at AAA, but I still know what they are talking about...lol They pay really good. Starting off in training the pay 11 per hour. Then after 6 weeks they give you a $.50 raise which puts you up to 11.50 per hour. On top of that since I will be working the mid shift they give me another $.93 raise so after 6 weeks of working there I will be making 12.53 per hour, 40 hours a week. After 90 days they offer health and dental insurance, but we won't need it because Jeramy is in the national guard, and their insurance is awesome. They will give me a free AAA membership, which is cool. I feel kind of bad though looking for a job knowing in November or December when Ashley has her baby and goes back to work, I will have to quit. But I would rather stay at home and watch her baby. That is what life is all about..... Def don't want my niece or nephew going into daycare. At least not at the infant stage. Once they get one or two, it's okay because they get the interaction with other kids. Which is good for them. My kids started going to daycare when they were either 2 and 4, or 3 and 5..... don't really remember, but they loved it. They still ask me to this day if they can start going back to that daycare......so anyways, A lot going on today and tomorrow, a lot of choices that have to be made!

About Me

My photo
Welcome to the wonderful life of me! I am married to my best friend, my soul mate, my right hand man, the love of my life and we have been blessed with 3 beautiful Z kiddos. Jeramy and I have known each other since we were 14 &16, and have been married for 5 years. He is in the Army and I get to be a stay at home mommy :) We have had our ups and downs, life hasn't always been peaches and cream, but we are blessed!