Thursday, January 20, 2011

28, are you serious???

Am I really 28 years old? Am I really this close to being 30?? Geesh!
My 28 years on this earth have sure been filled with every emotion you can think of. Guess you can say that I am one of those people who have to learn about life the hard way. Anything anyone told me I did the opposite, I rebelled against everything I ever knew. It took me "joining the circus" for 7 years for me to learn everything I needed to know about life, or I guess you can say what I thought life was all about. I learned that people can lie straight to your face and not think twice about it. I learned that some can be the most selfish people in the world. I learned that if you ever want anything done you have to do it yourself. But I also learned that I was a lot stronger than I ever thought I was. Almost 6 years ago I came out of the "fog" and came back around to the real world. I realized that life can be so much more than what I was doing. I came back to the man that always loved me for me. Being with him has made me learn that there really are good genuine people, with real and truthful intentions. I learned that you don't have to have knock down drag out fights to get your point across. I learned that not all men cheat and are out for themselves. I came back to a man that is just like my father.
So as I sit here and write this I can say without a shadow of doubt that my 28 years on this planet has been worth every single minute of it. I have been to the lowest of lows and am now riding the highest of highs. I am married to my best friend. I am married to the man that loves me no matter what. I am married to the man that "gets" the real April. Jeramy is my soul mate, and I love him with every ounce of my being. I have the privilege of being a mom. I am so thankful to God above that he entrusted me, ME, with three of his beautiful children. Zane, Zoei and Zeelynn are truly the sparkle in my eye, the reason I get up every morning and go through my day, their happiness and joy are first and foremost in my life. There will never be anything or anyone more important in my life. Someone wrote happy birthday to me on my facebook page. They said I hope all your dreams come true, oh wait seems like they already have. I thought to myself when I read it that it is the honest to God truth. This life I have is everything I ever thought it could be and so much more. Took me 28 years to find my "happy place" but damn it I'm here and loving every minute of it!!!

Monday, January 17, 2011

Right here Right now

As I sit here on the 17th of January 2011 I just smile. I have a little girl on the floor that is cooing and smiling at her brother. I have a son that is sitting next to me playing his video games, another daughter that is outside playing with her friends and a nephew that is sleeping. Seriously could I ever ask for more? With my birthday approaching really fast, and way to close to 30 I might add, I find myself being thankful. Do I sometimes wish I had a job outside of the house, do I sometimes feel like everyone sucks because they have somewhere to go and something to do, the answer is yes. You know the saying the grass is always greener on the other side, or so it may seem. But in the same breath I can say that there is no where else I would rather be. Right here, right now is where I am suppose to be and that feels so good. For the longest time in my life I was lost. Didn't really know where I fit in, or where I was suppose to go, or what I was suppose to do. I can say that I have figured all of that out. I am a MOM. I am suppose to be here to get my kids ready for school every morning and kiss them good-bye. I am suppose to be here during the day to watch my littlest Z kid grow up and to watch the coolest nephew in the world. I am suppose to be here waiting on my kids to get home from school. I am suppose to be here to make dinner every night so that we can sit down and eat like families should do. I am suppose to be here to help with homework and projects, diaper changes and feedings. I am suppose to be the one to tuck my kids in every night. So I say it again: Right here right now is where I am suppose to be. My life is oh so good. My aunt posted a question on Facebook the other day. Her question was " How do you describe the quality of your life." I thought about it for a little while and then wrote back. "I would have to say it's better than I ever thought it could be. I have a wonderful relationship with God who has blessed me and entrusted me with three of his beautiful babies, I am married to my best friend, I have the best family any girl could ask for.....Sure there are "hiccups" in this thing called life but this girls quality of life is grand!" I truly ment every word of it. There is nothing I would rather be doing, or a place I would rather be. Sure sometimes I want something else but it usually only last a few minutes and then I snap back in reality and realize just how good and fulfilled my life is!

About Me

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Welcome to the wonderful life of me! I am married to my best friend, my soul mate, my right hand man, the love of my life and we have been blessed with 3 beautiful Z kiddos. Jeramy and I have known each other since we were 14 &16, and have been married for 5 years. He is in the Army and I get to be a stay at home mommy :) We have had our ups and downs, life hasn't always been peaches and cream, but we are blessed!