Monday, February 28, 2011

love love love

Oh I love my life, love my life oh yes I do! I laid in bed last night thinking there is no other place in this world that I would rather be. I had my three kids in bed asleep and was laying next to the man of my dreams. Feel asleep a happy happy girl!  Saturday night we went out to celebrate my mom/sisters birthday. I invited some of my friends, my mom had some of her friends come. I can't begin to tell you how much damn fun I had! Beers flowing, shots of patron, and dancing our asses off. I love dueling piano bars, they are just so much damn fun. My mom is a hoot. You would never know that she was 57 years old. NEVER! She doesn't sit there like a stump on a log, she is up singing and dancing. LOVE that lady! My sister is so much damn fun too! I had a blast just bullshitting with her and dancing. Shannon, Stephanie, Sarah, Rachelle, Kayla and Mike came also. It was our old high school group back together and it was AMAZING!!! It was just a blast all the way around. My favorite people + drinks flowing = a damn good time! 
My stud Wilcox amazed the shit out of me that night too. I left around 7 to go to my sisters house. He not only stayed at home with all 3 kids, but cooked them dinner. Then when I got home Zeelynn was in one of her funks. I swear she knows when I go out drinking because she acts a damn fool. J stayed up with her and let me sleep for an hour or so. He only went to bed after I got up and took her from him. I was up with her till 5 and then she was up for good at 10.... Then we went out to eat last night, he carried Zeelynn in and out (which he usually does) he got all of the forks, knifes, napkins, salsa (he never does that) then when we were done eating he threw all the trash away....I was pretty impressed with him needless to say. I showed him how much I appreciated him last night LMFAO!!!! I know TMI! Anyways I am so happy and in love, truly blessed! PEaCE ouT

Monday, February 14, 2011

I love this man more today that I did yesterday, and even more tomorrow

I was looking on my computer for pics of our wedding because it's Valentine's Day and let's face it, it brings out the lovey dovey in me: I was so happy when I saw our wedding vows on here, I had forgot they were on here. Love that I can go back and read those precious words we said to each other on the special day:

We are gathered here today to celebrate one of life's greatest moments, to give recognition to the worth and beauty of love and to add our best wishes to the words which shall unite Jeramy and April in marriage.
Life is given to each of us as individuals and yet we must learn to live together. Love is given to us by our family and by our friends. We learn to love by being loved. Learning to love and living together is one of the greatest challenges of life, and is the shared goal of a married life.
Is it then you will to proceed?
Jeramy, today I become your wife and you become my husband. I will strive to give you the best of myself, while accepting you the way you are. I promise to respect you as a whole person with you own interest, desires and needs, and to realize that those are sometimes different , but no less important than my own. I promise to keep myself open to you, to let you in to my innermost fears and feelings, secrets and dreams. I promise to grow along with you, to be willing to face change as we both change, keeping our relationship alive and exciting. And finally , I promise to love you in good times and in bad, with all that I have to give and all that I am , in the only way I know how, Completely and forever.
April, today I become you husband and you become my wife. I will strive to give you the best of myself, while accepting you the way you are. I promise to respect you as a whole person with your own interest, desires, and needs, and to realize that those are sometimes different, but no less important than my own. I promise to keep myself open to you to let you in to my innermost fears and feelings, secrets and dreams. I promise to grow along with you , to be willing to face change as we both change, keeping our relationship alive and exciting. And finally, I promise to love you in good times and in bad, with all I have to give and all that I am, in the only way that I know how, Completely and forever.
What token of your devotion do you offer your beloved?
Wedding rings are an outward and visible sign of an inward spiritual grace and the unbroken circle of love, Signifying to all the union of this man and this woman in marriage.
Jeramy, please place this ring on april's hand and repeat after me.
I jeramy take you april to be my wife. To have and to hold in sickness and in health for richer and for poorer, and I promise my love to you forever.
April please place this ring on Jeramy's hand and repeat after me.
I April take you jeramy to be my husband. To have and to hold in sickness and in health for richer and for poorer, and I promise my love to you forever.
Jeramy and April as the two of you come into this marriage uniting you as husband and wife, and as you this day affirm your faith and love for one another, I would ask that you always remember to cherish each other as special and unique individuals, that you respect the thoughts, ideas and suggestions of one another. Be able to forgive do not hold grudges and to live each day that you may share it together. As from this day forward you shall be each others home, comfort and refuge, your marriage strengthened by your love and respect for each other.
A marriage ceremony represents one of life's greatest commitments. But it also is a declaration of love. I wish to read to you what Paul wrote of love in a letter to the Corinthians. I believe it is a true model of love and I hope you pursue in your marriage.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Let us pray:
Dear Heavenly Father, our hearts are filled with great happiness on Jeramy and April's wedding day as they come before you pledging their hearts and lives to one another . Grant that they May ever be true and loving, living together in such a way as to never bring shame or heartbreak into their marriage. Temper their heats with kindness and understanding, rid them of all pretense or jealousy. Help them to remember to be each others sweetheart, helpmate, best friend and guide, so that together they may meet the cares and problems of life more bravely. And with the passage of time, may they find great contentment in the rich joy of senior companionship. May the home they are creating today truly be a place of love and harmony, where Your Spirit is always present. Bless this marriage we pray and walk beside Jeramy and April throughout all of their lives together. We ask these things in Jesus name, Amen.
Jeramy and April in so much as the two of you have agreed to live together in holy matrimony have promised your love for each other by these vows, the joining of your hands and the giving of these rings, I now declare you husband and wife. Whom God hath put together let no one put asunder. May the Lord bless you and keep you.May the Lord make his face shine upon you, and be gracious to you.
Congratulations, you may kiss your bride.
It is my privilege to present to you Mr. and Mrs.
Jeramy Wilcox!

Friday, February 11, 2011

I am proud to stand beside a man who's integrity shines like a diamond in the dust.

      I am proud to stand beside a man who's integrity shines like a diamond in the dust.

In a couple of hours Jeramy is going to leave to go to Houston. His boss is letting him get off early since he has to drive so far. Sucks he had to go in at 6 this morning, but hey he does what he has to do. Respect him for that! On the weekends he does his drills it reminds me of what he signed up for. It's not just some 9-5 "job", it's not calling in when you just don't feel like going, it's a commitment to train your mind and body to defend a nation. It's being willing to leave your comfort zone, your wife, your children, family and friends to protect. I have so much respect, love and admiration for him. We talked while we were out for my birthday and he told me that when he gets deployed, he is ok with dying. He said no I don't want to leave you or the kids but just know that if I do die, I will with pride, I will die doing something I love. He said that if one of his battles come under fire that he isn't going to leave anyone, he will die with them.
Anyways lets get off that subject because it makes me start thinking about the "what if's" and we don't like the what if's...... I am going to go pack his stuff up and get him ready :) Peace out!

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Everything is A OK

So all hell broke lose on Monday but it was all fine and dandy by Tuesday night. There was a little bit of a stand off when Jeramy got home but I broke the ice by saying are we going to talk or are we going to just ignore eachother night. After about 3 or 4 hours of talking everything is A OK. We said everything that we needed to say, got everything off our chest and are back to being lovey dovey again. Last night he really proved that he heard what I was saying. He came home from work and we ate dinner as a family like we do every night. I told him that I wanted to go to the grocery store and get a few things because if the weather was going to get bad like they were saying then  I wanted to have a few things here for me and the kids to eat during the day. Sometimes on a Saturday or a Sunday he will go to the store with me, or like last week he went with me because the roads were bad so he drove. But NEVER on a night that he comes home from work does he go to the store with me. He usually stays here with the kids and I go. Last night he went with me. I thought ok, this is cool. So we went to the grocery store and then I told him to go to game stop. I went in and got him a new game because Tuesday night he got pissed and broke his game. LOL Anyways when we were leaving there he said we need to go to the dollar store. I said why do we need to go there, he said I can't tell you. I told him that I know what we do need, we need deodrant. We get to the store and I go get the deodrant and he takes Zeelynn and goes off somewhere. I thought to myself what in the hell is he up to? I pay and wait for him to get done doing what he is doing. He came to the front and said they don't have what I want. We left there and stop by CVS, can't find what he wants there either. So by the time we get to Walgreens, he finally tells me that he is looking for some dice. He goes in and gets some and when he comes out I ask him why do we need dice. He tells me that we are going to play farkle as a family. I just sit and smile on the way home thinking to myself did he really HEAR me this time? We get home and he tells the kids to finish cleaning off the table, so they do and then Zoei gets back on the computer and Zane gets back on the game. He tells them to get off, so Zoei looks at him and says why? He tells her that we are going to play farkle, with her big brown eyes she looks at him with such happiness and says we are going to play farkle as a family!! She was so happy, Zane was too. We played farkle till 10 last night, then the big kids went to bed. I fed and rocked Zeelynn and instead of Jeramy going into the room and going to bed, he sat on the couch and watched T.V. with me until I went and laid Zeelynn down. Then we both went to bed together.
I can't tell you how validated I feel. Makes me feel so good that he heard me, makes me feel so good that he is actually doing something about it. It's the best feeling in the world for me to speak my mind, tell him what I need and he does it. This is what a true partnership is all about, this is what an honest marriage is all about and its incredible! Love me some Wilcox!!

Monday, February 7, 2011

Oh what a night

Jeramy and I never fight, I seriously mean NEVER! We did when we first got back together but that was my fault because I didn't know how to have an adult conversation. He is so calm cool and easy going, I on the other hand fly off at the mouth, can't control my emotions and can get really nasty very easily. Last night it was a freakin stand off in the Wilcox house hold. I wanted to go out and get in the super bowl atmosphere and Jeramy wasn't going to let it happen. Yes we made an aggrement a long time ago that I wouldn't go out on nights that he has to go to work the next day. Just in case Zeelynn pulls one of her crazy stunts, not that she has done it in a LONG time, but ya know, things are always crazy with kids. My point was it was the super bowl, and who knows when it is going to be back here in my hometown. He sat on the game and played it all day long, then played poker, did NOTHING with the baby all day long. Didn't feed her, didn't change her, burb her, put her to sleep nothing, zip , nada how ever you want to say it he did nothing. So when he told me that he wasn't going to watch the baby while I went out it went all over me. I thought you selfish asshole, I have done everything all day long while you do nothing and you won't give me a couple hours to go bs with my friends. WTF??? He hid the keys from me so since I said screw you I will have someone come and pick me up, he got in the car and left so that even if someone showed up to pick me up I had no choice to stay here because I had all 3 kids. What does any normal wife do in that situation do, ok maybe not normal but what does April do in that situation, LOCK HIS ASS OUT! The key only unlocks the bottom lock, does nothing for the dead bolt. He called after he left and it all ended with us having a screaming match over the phone. We called eachother every name in the book. I told him that he was selfish as hell and as long as he got to do whatever he wanted to do and no one put a kink in it then life was all good, but damn it if I needed to get out and he was going to have to stop doing what he was doing and take care of his daughter then all hell broke lose. I did call him a bad father because he has nothing to do with Zeelynn. He holds her if she is in a good mood, he plays with her but the only time he feeds, changes, rocks anything else that goes with taking care of a baby is when I am not here. If I run to the grocery store, or go pay a bill.... I did tell him to shut his fuckin mouth that I didn't want to hear anything he said, and I'm sure there is a lot more that I said but don't remember LOL. He called me a bad mother, a drunk, said all I care about is going out and getting fucked up, and he said I want him to work all day long and then come home and take care of the baby so that I can sit on my ass all day long.... REALLY???? I am a stay at home mom. I have two kids to get up and get ready for school every morning, I have a 5 month old that is with me 24/7, and I babysit my nephew. I do all the cooking, all the dishes, all the cleaning, all the laundry, taking out the trash, paying all the bills. All he has to do is be at work at a certain time, work all day and then at 6:30 he's off. Doesn't have anything to do for the rest of the night. He comes home to dinner that is ready and on the table. He eats and then plays the game till he is ready to go to bed and then goes to sleep..... I am couped up in this house 24/7, don't even have a car here to go somewhere if I wanted to, I am with the kids 24/7 but in his eyes it is selfish for me to want to get out of the house for a couple hours with my friends????
He had to call me to open the door so that he could come back home and when he got home he fed the baby her bottle, rocked her to sleep and then went to bed. All of this happened by 10:30, if he was going to do it in the end why couldn't I have gone out? Why did we have to go through a yelling screaming match? Doesn't make sence to me at all, I will be really curious to see what the atmosphere is going to be like when he gets home....

Friday, February 4, 2011

Feb. 4, 2011 Snow day

So this is the 4th day of no school. I really will never understand Texas weather LOL Sunday it was in the 70's, Monday it was in the 50's, by Tuesday morning it was nothing but ice on the roads and the temp was in the 20's. Here it is Friday and mother nature decided to give us about 6 inches of snow last night. Too cool!! The kids have had so much fun not going to school and ice skating in our driveway. I have had a blast with them being home ~  There is nothing like seeing their faces smile from ear to ear when they look outside and see the ice and snow. There is nothing better than hearing Zane and Zoei play with Zeelynn, making faces at her and talking the baby talk. She just smiles and coos back at them like they are really having a conversation. Oh being a mother is so rewarding.... Speaking of being a mom, my littlest Z is wanting some attention so I will be going LOL

About Me

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Welcome to the wonderful life of me! I am married to my best friend, my soul mate, my right hand man, the love of my life and we have been blessed with 3 beautiful Z kiddos. Jeramy and I have known each other since we were 14 &16, and have been married for 5 years. He is in the Army and I get to be a stay at home mommy :) We have had our ups and downs, life hasn't always been peaches and cream, but we are blessed!